....that it allows no room for the truth – as the room is already full of THEIR truth.

Do you know how this happens? Why it happens?

Think of it this way;

Everybody has a library of experiences in their subconscious mind. This library is made up of a vast collection of experiences that they went through in their lifetime. As they live through new experiences, they file these in their library according to the books of stories which are already there. Each book is placed in reference to another. As the collection of books increases, they all build upon and add to this unique way of filing and referencing.

Every body has a different collection of books. Everybody files away their experiences in a slightly different manner – even if two people see the same event, they file it away differently according to their existing collection of stories.

So the fact is that you presume too, about others, about yourself, about the world around you. Because you too have your own unique library and your experiences are filed within that.

You can only see and understand through your reference points…

Unless you are willing to be open, curious and willing to be challenged, then you can venture outside of your own library.

This is why certain things make absolutely no sense to us and we do not understand them at all, because we have no prior experience, we have no reference point to start from.

A simple example of this is going in to a shop to buy milk. Most people have a rough idea of what milk costs, take aside the different brands and sizes of containers, if I told you I bought milk priced at €10, you’d know I had been overcharged. Because you have a reference point.

Now, if I told you I paid €10 for an uncommon item you had never bought, say a bicycle repair kit, you would have no way of knowing if that was over, under or average price – because you had no reference point.

So going forward, when you are judged in the wrong, remember that it takes a strong person to challenge themselves out of their comfort zone and not use their library of reference points. Most will judge according to their beliefs, whether they match yours or not. They do it from a subconscious level.

And for you, when you are faced with the every day situations which you are doing your best to understand, know that you cannot always understand either.

Although it can often be hurtful when people behave in a way that is not how we want, most of the time, it is not personal, it is really about them and their stuff.

Remember this;

• People behave from a place of their value systems, not yours.

• People behave for their needs, not yours.

• People are preoccupied by their issues, not yours.

• People are trying to cope with their problems, not yours.

• People are usually not trying to hurt you on purpose, they are trying to soothe themselves.

• People are just doing the best they know how with the skills they have…

And so are you.

We are all just doing the best we can in any given moment, on any given day.